Category: Uncategorized

  • Jai Alai

    While Miami bustles with brahs and Barbi castoffs slipping past velvet ropes to enter dub-step soaked clubs, I’m off to the Jai Alai courts. Free entrance to a cavernous, air-conditioned stadium where a few dozen other people assemble, placing bets on each of the twelve rounds, shout obscenities in their native Spanish (baaassssuuuuuuuuuura!), enter raffles,…

  • Lil Wayne – Me and My Drank

    With hopes of a full and speedy recovery for one of our age’s greatest artists. Weezy. F – Get well soon!

  • Front-Runner for Most Dissapointing Fruit of 2013?

    The Lemon Plum! The yellow lemon teardrop shaped fruit had potential in appearance … but the taste? Just another goddamn plum. Nothing lemon about it. what a waste of a Friday night …      

  • Clearly, the question begged by the picture involves airport security. Can a person smuggle a steak (Miami’s finest Bistice de Boliche) through airport security in his pocket. the answer? And didn’t even get my blood stains on my linen pants.

  • Zoo Snack

    This is the food they feed to the birds in the Miami Zoo’s “Wings of Asia” aviary. As you can see, its a blend of fresh grapes, grains and seeds. While the keeper wasn’t looking (had her distracted telling the story of the man who kept a pet hyena in his South Beach apartment. )…

  • A Tragedy of Sorts

    In response to the nation’s dire economic situation, the monarch has demanded that state banquets no longer serve baby carrots alongside the spread of dips, but rather full sized carrots that guests can whittle down to infant size with their silverware if they so choose.

  • Oktoberfest

    I went to an Oktoberfest. One might assume Miami is an absurd place to attempt a traditional Oktoberfest. One would be correct. The beer garden needed to be weeded of palm trees. After forty minutes, the lederhosen-clad band abandoned polka and played radiohead covers.

  • Archive of Past Blogs

    July 14, 2012 Revelation Ingredients listed on a bag of baby carrots: carrots July 10, 2012 It’s Probably 5pm on Tristan Da Cunha Tristan Da Cunha is the world’s most remote, inhabited island. It sits in the middle of the Atlantic 2,816 km from South Africa and 3360 km from South America. Its interesting history (it was…